Everyone's story is immortalized in a way or another. I personally need to put precious moments in an imaginary "glass box " and not touch it until it calls me back to be opened and remember why I am here, what brought me here & especially - why am I doing what I chose to do in the first place.
Mostly to remind me to not give up. Always believe.
As if the child is talking, the child is thinking & the child is doing.
I love art. I've doing it my whole life. I often say " I am not good at anything else other than art " only to re-assure myself that this is my way to be, to exist. Creating.
I boxed memories and moments, even people, because I wanted to believe that everything will be untouched and stay as I leave it - till I'm ready to come back and begin again or go from there on. Camera gave me this feeling of immortality. Untouched. I can't say that the only reason I photograph is selfishly for me but it started that way. My selfish, childish desire to be as happy as I was in that moment- always and forever.
When I was young I kept asking my mom " If you die, will you take me with you? Can you be immortal? Mom's don't die, right?"
My mom was never able to answer my 4 year old self questions.
The camera did answer. Effortless.
And 12 years almost passed by since I first picked up a camera and was never afraid I will lose memories, moments or the people I love because I kept it safe - in a glass box.
There are so many moments when I want to scream to the sky and ask "why this?" . The silenced scream comes from my insecure chest. Fear that I haven't done my best today to become better. Do more. In situations like that I find myself having a fast heartbeat and a great need to get to work. Squeeze everything I can from my chest and just work without hesitation, without thinking twice about what I want to do exactly. Life goes on with or without us, right? Might as well make it the best ride in the world, on our terms.